It's winter break.

Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulliah. Alhamdulillah i've finished my final exam for this semester yesterday. Five papers. The first and the last papers were so hard :( I've done everything that i could and now i will just keep praying that i will pass all the papers and finish my last semester of learning theory and insyaAllah going into clinical next semester. Seriously if i need to repeat, i don't think i can do it and study everything once again. Its like a nightmare. Totally horrible. I didn't cook for almost a month. Went to library early in the morning, eat biscuits, yogurt or everything that i could grab for lunch and dinner. Medical library is closed at 11pm so i always went to Hercus (a 24 hour computer lab) and continue my study in there. Luckily i have a few seniors that sometimes came and lepak there as well so i didn't feel that 'lonely' haha :p anyway, and then i studied there until 2, 3am and sometimes until morning and straight away went to school after that without changing clothes or brushing my teeth. How horror my life was during the exam T_T For the last 3 weeks i've been relying on too much caffeine. Drinking flat white coffee that cost me $4.50 a cup everyday. And now i have  a big problem. I can't sleep early. Too much stimulants. Too much dopamine until sometimes i couldn't realize which one is reality and which one is not. Drugs. They are good but they give you bad effects too. Crying alone in the library or hercus or along the road because of the exam pressure and homesickness was normal the last few weeks. But the good thing is that, i like walking home alone late at night or early in the morning when nobody is on the road. Just me, the stars and the moon. Gazing them while walking in the cold freezing weather, almost below 0 degree celcius . Peacefulness :) yeah thats how i relieved the stress that i had everyday.And now, i need my break. Please, i really really need my break. To keep my messy room clean, to qada' my sleep, to relax in my own room or anywhere i want to go, to do what i want and etc etc before start working again on monday. Hopefully I will get everything done. Oh wait wait! Before i forget, today had dinner with Dr Brunton. He's retiring soon. In his speech today he said ' we are people because of  other people ' His words always touch my heart :') 

Gonna miss him ...

p/s i keep myself away from people doesn't mean that i'm away from HIM.

okay bye have a great winter break! ;)

The yellow land turns white.

It was snowing heavily in Christchurch last week. A friend of mind took some great photos (i've asked his permission to post his photos here anyway) and i feel so jealous! The snow turned the world white. Totally white. SubhanAllah can't describe with words. Hoping for more and more snow in Dunedin but oh please come after exam! Enjoy the wonderland! 

p/s three more papers to go and it's winter break. come quick because i want to enjoy the beautiful winter wonderland! ;)

It snowed last night!

Alhamdulillah it snowed last night! after subuh prayer, i opened the window hoping everything is white outside, and yahoo it is white but not much. but it's enough :) the hills covered with snow, the roofs,the cars and a wee bit on my verandah. oh well, thats more than enough. and today is the first day of final exam. must do the best! ;)

melting snow flakes on my verandah

Hills covered with snow.

bye and wish me luck! 

i wish ...

It's officially winter now in New Zealand. My third winter :) 

Hoping for snow again this year *praying with teary eyes* 

(picture of a snowy day during winter 2011)

Someone says ''place your hand over your heart, feel that? thats called purpose. you're alive for a reason. don't give up'' :)

Putting my hands over my heart and feel my own heartbeats while saying ' oh Allah, make me strong. make me strong to face all the difficulties ', does helps me getting rid of this giving up feeling. yes, we're alive for a reason, so keep breathing and never ever give up :)