Candle ...

It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.

''Their likeness of one who kindled a fire; then, when it lighted all around him, Allah took away their light and left them in the darkness.So, they could not see.'' (1:17)

The man wanted light, he only kindled fire.It produced a blaze and won the applause of all around.But it did not last long. When the flame went out as was inevitable, the darkness was worse than before. And they all lost their way. So hypocrisy,deception,arrogant compromise with evil,cynicism or duplitity may win temporary applause.But the true light of faith and sincerity is wanting and therefore it must mislead and ruin all concerned.

I was reading Quran this morning after subuh prayer under the light of my small table lamp. My room was not that bright. While reading, i felt guilty. I realized that i always want the bright light. The white bulb instead of yellowish bulb. How ignorant I am. But ahem,actually I have two lamps,white for study table and yellow for bed.

Anyway,back to the quote and the ayat, we are not here to curse the darkness but to light the candle that can guide us through the darkness to a safer and brighter path towards our future. Be sincere (always please) and the light will shine. The bright light will fade away if we light it up just to show our greatness.

Oh Allah, please show me the bright light, so that I can walk trough the right path.


p/s: Dah dah jom siap siap pergi sekolah. Ish online memanjang. Mari belajar! ;D

Semangat please!

Imam Ahmad Ibn Hanbal [rahimullah] said :“If You Desire Allah to be persistent in granting you the thing you love, be persistent in doing the things He Ta’ala loves”.

ALLAH LOVES:
*those who do good deeds [2:195]
*those who ask Him for forgiveness [2:222]
*those who purify themselves [2:222]
*those who are Allah-fearing [3:76]
*those who are steadfast [3:146]
*those who trust Him [3:159]
*those who act justly [5:42]
*those who strive for His cause [61:4]
*those who follow His Prophet Muhammadﷺ (pbuh) [3:31]

ALLAH DOES NOT LOVE:
*the aggressors (2:190)
*the disbelievers (3:32)
*those who inflict injustice (3:57)
*evil (5:64) and evil doers (2:205)
*those who are arrogant (4:36)
*those who spend lavishly (6:141)

[4:124] "As for those who lead a righteous life, male or female, while believing, they enter Paradise; without the slightest injustice."

Ya Allah, kuatkan semangatku! Ameen :)

Breathless.

I feel like I'm drowning in a wide sea. I'm trying to swim and go up to the surface. But the more I swim, the more i feel breathless. No matter how hard I'm trying I still can't reach the surface. I don't want to swim because I know the thing that is waiting for me at the surface is not what I want. But I'm forcing myself because swimming is the only way for me to survive ...

Next week:
Two essays to be submitted (Not yet finished & <---- what ??)
One report to be submitted.
My Dispensing final exam??

My heart beats so fast until I can't feel that it is beating. Less than one month to go before final exams. But I still haven't start reading or revising anything yet. Too many things to be submitted each week T_T and too many things to study until I don't know which one should I start working on O_o...

PadaMu ku bersujud.

ku menatap dalam kelam
tiada yang bisa ku lihat
selain hanya nama-Mu Ya Allah
*courtesy of LirikLaguIndonesia.net
* esok ataukah nanti
ampuni semua salahku
lindungi aku dari segala fitnah

kau tempatku meminta
kau beriku bahagia
jadikan aku selamanya
hamba-Mu yang slalu bertakwa

ampuniku Ya Allah
yang sering melupakan-Mu
saat Kau limpahkan karunia-Mu
dalam sunyi aku bersujud

This song really touches my heart. Every time I feel sad, I'll listen to it. It makes me think that I'm not alone. I have Him (always), family, friends ...

Alhamdulillah. I'm feeling better today. Better than yesterday. I have my housemates that love me. I have friends that always cheer me up. I have friends far far away in the homeland that always concern about me.

To Afzan, my bestie, thank you for lending your ears to me last night. Listening to my stories. Making jokes to create smile on my face.

To Mimi, I know you're worried about me now. I'm sorry for not telling you yet.But i will do that.Soon. For now, don't worry too much ok. I'll be alright.

Back to normal life, we're going to have our open house tomorrow. Can't wait to 'rewang' tonight with my housemates. Cooking, baking, cleaning the house. Alhamdulillah Allah for giving me such lovely housemates that can always make me smile :)

Lega?

''Sorry la weh...at least ak boleh keep your secret...jgn sedih2... Nnt ok laa tue... Kebenaran akan kekal tp kepalsuan akan hilang.. ''  A text from a friend.

Muscle contraction.

I can't stop thinking about what had happened.I'm stressed thinking of the problems.I feel my neck muscle is contracting so forcefully. Too many things are mixing up in my mind. Today I had no mood doing anything. Couldn't focus much in the class but luckily my best friend, Cat always wake me up. We had Pharmacology lab and we had to measure the contraction of Guinea Pig's ileum by giving it different dosages of drug. My mind wasn't in the lab while doing the experiment,so you know what i've done? I accidentally pulled the spring that holding the ileum up and it was sucked into the tube supplying oxygen and other things.What am I doing? I'm sorry group mates. I didn't mean to ruin our experiment T_T . Then we ended up having no results at all and I just went out from the lab earlier than others. 


Like I said He knows everything and I'll pray the best for them. Hopefully they will be okay and forgive me. And for the person making this great great great 'story' about me, I hope you will realize your fault and stop making up stories about people that can ruin their lives. Allah is Great. Allah will never let this kind of people keep doing bad things.

"Oh you who believe! Seek help with patient perseverance and prayer, for God is with those who patiently persevere." (2:153)

I have test again tomorrow. Oh fragile heart, please stop crying. Oh brilliant brain, please stop thinking of those stupid things. We need to work together to face this okay. Oh Allah, help me focusing on my studies. Do your best Fairuz. Come on, you can do it !

Did you know?

Did you know that the people that seem the strongest are usually the most
sensitive?

Did you know that the people who exhibit the most kindness are usually the first to get mistreated?

Did you know the ones who take care of others all the time are usually the ones that need it the most?

Did you know the 3 hardest things to say are: I love you, I'm sorry and Help me!

Rmadhan 26-29 dan syawal

Ramadhan 26
I skipped classes and started my journey to go back home.

Ramadhan 27-29
Alhamdulillah dapat bersahur dan berbuka dengan keluarga di kampung.Semasa di kampung banyak benda berlaku.Firstly,motel Kak Ngoh di Kot Bharu dirompak.Habis hilang phones,laptop adik.Adik dah jadi macam laki mati bini.Monyok je tak bercakap langsung sebab geram sangat dekat pencuri tu.Siap pergi rumah bomoh bomoh lagi sebab geram sangat.Secondly,kakak dan abang sulong accident on the way balik dari KL to Kota Bharu dekat Kuala Terengganu.Bergegas saya,ayah,Kak Ngoh and Chik pergi KT lepas sahur.Ayah terkejut sangat sebab dia tak tahu pun yang diaorang on the way balik.Kami rahsiakan hal ni dari pengetahuan Ma sebab tak nak Ma terkejut.Lately blood pressure Ma tinggi.Alhamdulillah minor injuries je,but kereta Honda City baru kakak hancur separuh.Memang teruk kereta tu.Mana tak teruk semua benda dia langgar.Tiang lampu,pagar jalan and terus masuk longkang.

Semasa kat kampung,hati rasa sayu sangat mengenangkan apa yang berlaku.Ayah macam biasa la asyik sakit je.Ma pulak sekarang makin lama makin pelik.Tak tahu kenapa.Dia membenci semua orang di sekelilingnya,jiran,saudara,kawan etc.Sebab tu blood pressure tinggi.Tengok je muka Ma,rasa nak nangis tapi tahan je.Ma pulak asyik nangis kadang kadang tanpa bersebab.Sebab tu kami selalu rahsiakan apa yang terjadi.Dia makin mudah lupa.Makin kurang pendengaran.Makin menjadi pemarah.Ya Allah apa dah jadi dengan Ma...Hati tak tahan tengok Ma macam tu yang asyik menangis je T_T....Tambah pulak dengan masalah kakak sorang ni yang suka cari gaduh dengan semua orang.Tak dengar cakap.Buat hal sesuka hati.Kesia ayah ngan Ma kena hadapi masalah kakak ni.Tak boleh ke dengar cakap parents dan tak menyusahkan parents?Geram betul.

Syawal 1-3

Raya pun macam tak bermakna sangat je tahun nie.Balik Malaysia konon konon nak sambut raya dengan family.Nak bergembira.Tapi sebaliknya pulak.Ya Allah moga moga kau lindungi ayah,Ma,adik beradik ku Ya Allah.Saya tak sanggup tengok keadaan Ma macam tu dan ayah macam ni.Gembirakan hati mereka Ya Allah.

Raya ke 4 saya dah bertolak balik ke Auckland.Hati sedih tak terkata nak tinggalkan parents dalam keadaan macam ni.Tapi apakan daya perjuangan kat sini kena teruskan.Singgah di Auckland for one night.Pergi majlis perahwinan Musab dan Natasha.Tahniah.
Malam tu teruskan perjalanan pulang,ambil flight ke Christchurch dan bermalam di rumah Kak Norlyn sekeluarga.Ambil bas keesokan harinya ke Dunedin.Alhamdulillah akhirnya sampai Dunedin.Kerja sekolah tak siap lagi.Badan rasa sakit,asyik nak muntah,pening,sejuk semacam.Sah demam T_T...HOMESICK!!!