Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulliah. Alhamdulillah i've finished my final exam for this semester yesterday. Five papers. The first and the last papers were so hard :( I've done everything that i could and now i will just keep praying that i will pass all the papers and finish my last semester of learning theory and insyaAllah going into clinical next semester. Seriously if i need to repeat, i don't think i can do it and study everything once again. Its like a nightmare. Totally horrible. I didn't cook for almost a month. Went to library early in the morning, eat biscuits, yogurt or everything that i could grab for lunch and dinner. Medical library is closed at 11pm so i always went to Hercus (a 24 hour computer lab) and continue my study in there. Luckily i have a few seniors that sometimes came and lepak there as well so i didn't feel that 'lonely' haha :p anyway, and then i studied there until 2, 3am and sometimes until morning and straight away went to school after that without changing clothes or brushing my teeth. How horror my life was during the exam T_T For the last 3 weeks i've been relying on too much caffeine. Drinking flat white coffee that cost me $4.50 a cup everyday. And now i have a big problem. I can't sleep early. Too much stimulants. Too much dopamine until sometimes i couldn't realize which one is reality and which one is not. Drugs. They are good but they give you bad effects too. Crying alone in the library or hercus or along the road because of the exam pressure and homesickness was normal the last few weeks. But the good thing is that, i like walking home alone late at night or early in the morning when nobody is on the road. Just me, the stars and the moon. Gazing them while walking in the cold freezing weather, almost below 0 degree celcius . Peacefulness :) yeah thats how i relieved the stress that i had everyday.And now, i need my break. Please, i really really need my break. To keep my messy room clean, to qada' my sleep, to relax in my own room or anywhere i want to go, to do what i want and etc etc before start working again on monday. Hopefully I will get everything done. Oh wait wait! Before i forget, today had dinner with Dr Brunton. He's retiring soon. In his speech today he said ' we are people because of other people ' His words always touch my heart :')
Gonna miss him ...
p/s i keep myself away from people doesn't mean that i'm away from HIM.
okay bye have a great winter break! ;)
okay bye have a great winter break! ;)
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